This is the Passover season, when the story of the exodus from Egypt is retold. The name “Egypt” in Hebrew is “Mitzrayim,” and it comes from the root word “tzar,” which means a narrow place. This story, recited at Seder tables around the world, is not told just as a recollection of a historical event, but also as a metaphor. Participants in this ceremony are asked to imagine that they, themselves, had escaped from Egypt. The idea being that sooner or later, we too will have to negotiate our way through some narrow spaces.

We each face our own tight spots— we may feel captured, even enslaved and hopeless, by our struggles. The Passover story is about making it through those tight places by surrounding ourselves with a community of support and staying connected to people who fill us with a sense of possibility and hope. Here is a modern Passover story:

Peter Jennings, chief ABC News anchorman for more than 20 years, just announced he has lung cancer. In an e-mail he wrote to ABC colleagues soon after he learned the diagnosis, he said, “I begin chemotherapy next week. I will continue to do the broadcast. There will be good days and bad, which means that some days I may be cranky, and some days really cranky!”

Peter Jennings inspires me. As medicine increasingly prolongs lives, and the workforce ages, people will continue to work with debilitating diseases. Pope John Paul II’s contributions were not diminished by his Parkinson’s disease. Chief Justice William Rehnquist, at 80, is being treated for thyroid cancer and has returned to the court. Arizona Senator John McCain has faced recurring bouts of melanoma. Tens of thousands of ordinary people face similar tight spots.

I read this story in the Seattle Post-Intelligencer, while sitting in an airport recently. Diagnosed with leukemia at age 16, Tamara Stevens is now 48 and is the longest-living survivor of one of the first bone marrow transplants. Today, she is nearly nine years into treatment for an aggressive form of breast cancer. During the past nine years, she has had surgery, radiation, and continues to get an infusion every three weeks. She has also raised two children, completed nine marathons, designs jewelry, and works full-time as a project manager for Boeing. Tamara says the key to dealing with cancer is not stopping the things you love to do, especially work. She also advises to surround yourself with others who share a positive outlook, and let go of negative energy.

This is a Passover story . . . illness can enslave the body and spirit, and there will be good days and bad. But, if you face them in community, connected to something that reminds you of the dream, it will help get you through the narrow places to experience your own liberation.

All of these people are heroes in their life’s journey and prophets of hope for us all.

Registered for the Healing Cafe? If not, click here

This is the season of my birthday, and my grandkids think I’m an old man. Although, they still call me up and ask me to come out and play. The old man is still feeling good — working, writing, traveling — trying to reverse the stereotype that aging people are a burden on society. There is much talk about how older Americans are “breaking down the system,” with predictions that Medicare and Social Security are going broke. So here’s a story of people past retirement age, who, instead of bankrupting the system, are giving it back. Makes me feel good about getting older.

Jerry Conover, a 65-year-old retiree from Denver Colorado, made a good income as a lawyer. He was still working part-time as a mediator in legal disputes. When Jerry got his first retirement check, he didn’t need it. Jerry is among a small, but significant group of Social Security recipients, who don’t need it. They have other retirement plans in place that already meet their needs, so this is gravy.

This is NOT the case for most of the 33 million Americans who get Social Security. Most of them depend on those checks for more than half of their income. About 13% would fall below the poverty line without them.

At first, Jerry thought about putting it in a “lock box” for his kids and grandkids (not that they needed it). Instead, Jerry founded Hope for Generations, a nonprofit foundation to benefit low-income children in his community. He decided to do this in 2003, after talking to some friends who were in a similar position, (getting government checks at the end of lucrative careers), who had enough for themselves and for their kids. The foundation has about 30 donors. Jerry’s pitch to them was that if you can look at your Social Security check as a windfall rather than a necessity, why not give something back.
In 2003 (its first year), Hope for Generations raised $60,000; in 2004, $100,00. The money was used to support local schools’ enrichment programs, specialty teachers, and extracurricular programs.

Already, Jerry Conover’s program has inspired others. Last month, the Merage Foundation, Newport Beach, California, announced Children’s First, a program for low-income kids in their community. Some donors give their full Social Security benefits, others as little as $50 a month. What a great way to “pay it forward,” reinvesting your profits in the dreams of a new generation. If somebody organizes one in Phoenix, count me in.

Registered for the Healing Cafe? If not, click here

The TV dramatization of Terri Schiavo’s death focused world attention on who pulls the plug and when. Terri left no written instructions about what she would want done if she were ever in this kind of situation. There were only the whispered, intimate conversations that husbands and wives have. Ultimately, it was her husband who spoke up for her, in a daily drama that was played worldwide.

There have been several movies out recently dealing with end-of-life issues. Unlike Terri, however, these are about people who chose their own time to die. The Academy Award-winning film “This Sea Inside” is one. Based on the true story of Ramon Sampedro, this is a terrific movie.

Ramon Sampedro, at age 18, fractured his neck in a diving accident, leaving him unable to move anything below his neck. Ramon lay virtually motionless and bedridden for 30 years. During this time, he wrote two books, one of which, Letters from Hell, inspired this movie. He also learned how to fly: he discovered how to escape his physical limitations by imagining that he could soar through the countryside. It lifted his spirit. He fell in love, and he wrote beautiful poetry. But, after 30 years, believed he’d learned enough and wanted to end his life. Ramon needed somebody to help make the lethal cyanide cocktail and leave it at his bedside, so that all he had to do was turn his neck and suck it up through a straw. The Sampedro case, and assisted suicide, became a national debate in Catholic Spain.


Javier Bardem, the magnificent actor who played Ramon, was interviewed and asked what it was like to play this role. Bardem said, “It’s hard lying still for 5 or 6 hours and I got panicky. But I also learned some important things about myself, like how to control my anxiety, still my movements and tame my impatience. I also learned some important things about Ramon, to identify with what a beautiful thing it might be to be able to move beyond my body and fly.”

Knowing Ramon as he did, Javier was asked whether he could have assisted in Ramon’s death. Bardem took a stand and said, “I am not somebody to tell a person like Ramon Sampedro how he should feel, or what he should do with his life. If you truly love a person and you feel his or her wish comes from a very conscious awareness of their situation; that it’s a mature response to their situation well, I guess I would do it. It’s his life, it’s not my life.”

We need to be discussing end-of-life policy in this country too. Oregon has a “Death With Dignity Act” which has twice been approved in statewide voter referendums. It is the only statute in the United States that allows doctors to write lethal prescriptions for terminally ill patients who want to control the time and place of their death. For patients to qualify, they have to be fully conscious and able to administer their own overdose. Even in Oregon, Ramon Sampedro could not have chosen of the time of his death.

For me, I want to say clearly that if the quality of my life no longer brings me joy, I’d like to decide when I’ve had enough.

Registered for the Healing Cafe? If not, click here

The Catholic Church is facing a shortage of qualified exorcists. There simply aren’t enough clergymen to handle the avalanche of requests from people who believe that they are possessed. So for the first time (Feb. 2005), the Vatican has sanctioned a course for priests and bishops dedicated to teaching exorcism.

What is exorcism? It’s the use of prayer to rid a person of demonic spirits. It has its roots in early Christianity but fell out of favor after the Age of Enlightenment. Advances in science and technology made exorcism seem like primitive magic.

There has been a huge revival of interest in exorcism over the last two decades. A tribute to the power of Hollywood movies, pulp novels, and the late Pope John Paul’s belief, that Satan is a presence in daily life and must be battled.

How can you tell if a person is a candidate for exorcism? The Rev. Gabriel Nanni, an exorcist who taught the recent course at Rome’s Regina Apostolorum Pontifical University, said that authentic demonic possession “must include an utter revulsion to holy symbols such as crucifixes or baptismal oil.” For appropriate candidates, I have no problem with exorcism at all. For most others who are “possessed,” it’s invariably the result of some physical or psychological reason that requires seeing a doctor.

As a psychiatrist, I don’t talk about “demonic possession.” In our vernacular, we call it “the incorporation of a negative introject.” Lots of people have been terribly abused, and/or experienced unspeakably tragic events; I try to help those people move beyond their fear, rage, and internalized demons. I use symbols, myths, interpretation, and medications.

From my work in Indian Country, I learned to add other elements to my therapeutic repertoire: prayer, singing, ceremonies, prescribing ordeals, and using awesomely powerful, psychoactive drugs. Psychotherapy is just another form of sanctioned exorcism; I believe that any power psychotherapists can bring to bear to help people mobilize their own power and promote resilience is therapeutic.

Registered for the Healing Cafe? If not, click here